3 Ways to Stay Connected When Life is Busy

Lately we’ve been thinking about how to stay connected a lot, because summers are SO, SO BUSY!  i’ve also been talking with clients about how to prioritize their relationship when for 3-4 months, it can feel like all you do is run around, work, and shuffle kids to every activity known to man.  As fun as summer sounds in theory, sometimes our primary relationships start to feel neglected which causes loneliness and reactivity that is stressful.

This in turn will cause you to view your relationship in a more negative light and escalate into conflict more quickly when you do get a chance to have uninterrupted conversations with your spouse.  Our major message to you is to protect the time for your relationship – ALL YEAR!  It has to be on the calendar like everything else, or it will fall off.  Is it spontaneous to plan a date night 6 weeks ahead of time? Obviously not.  But is it necessary sometimes? 100%, absolutely.

Here are 3 ideas to stay connected during the busy summer:

Interactive Activities.  How easy is it to sit on the couch, turn on your new favorite show, and sit in silence (or on cell phones!) until bedtime?  We’re all guilty of this! But if your relationship needs strengthening, this won’t cut it unfortunately. It’s better to be interactive – in other words, do something you can both participate in that involves talking.  Sometimes, just cooking a meal, or going on a walk is a great choice.

Focus on flirting.  If you don’t have hours to spend together, are you still flirting?  Spend a moment thinking about the things that make you feel playful and attractive – you two probably used to do them for each other all the time.  A quick shoulder rub with a kiss in the kitchen, grabbing your partner’s hand, playing hard to get a little bit? These things can take seconds during a busy day and BONUS – flirtiness increases sexual drive.

Keep morning and bedtime routines in sync.  Waking up and going to bed at the same times together gives you an opportunity to connect (hopefully kids-free).  Even if it’s an extra 20-30 minutes of chatting before you head off to work or sleep, that’s better than nothing.

Most importantly, be INTENTIONAL.  You won’t feel connected if you don’t really create the time.  Suggestions and strategies always follow your level of willingness.  When you choose to prioritize it, the magic happens!

If you’re interested in starting the therapy process to feel more connected and improve your relationship, reach out to Revive today to get started!